The Man Code

Man Code

1. You may never date a friend's ex or relative without his explicit permission.

2. You may not torpedo another man's chances with a girl.

3. You are obligated serve as a wingman for a friend, and you will be owed reasonable payment for your duty.

4. You shall provide no information about a friend's whereabouts when questioned by his girlfriend.

5. You must attempt one intervention to stop a drunken friend from cheating on his girlfriend before you are absolved of responsibility.

6. You are obligated to tap your friend when a hot girl walks by.

7. You may not join your girlfriend in badmouthing one of your friends.

8. You must never like your girlfriend's cat, or any other cat.

The Winter Girlfriend Theory

A Winter girlfriend is the ideal companion for the colder months. Keeping warm and comfortable is the focus here, so although you wouldn't call her fat, she has a thicker build than girls you would normally date. The Winter girlfriend has a few key advantages:

- Perfect to nap on, could replace your pillow

- Won't order "just a salad"

- Unlikely to complain about temperature outside

- Won't take your jacket

The Summer girlfriend is exactly the opposite. She is great for June through August, and looks great in a bathing suit. This girl may be a lot of fun for a while, but as fall comes you will start to see some of her disadvantages, and may notice she is kind of a bitch.

The Fall and Spring months are ideal transitional periods, as it takes time to dump a girlfriend and seek out a new one for the upcoming season. However, for those looking for something a bit more long-term than a three month relationship, a Spring/Fall girlfriend is the way to go. She falls somewhere between the Summer and Winter girlfriends, and provides a more balanced and stable personality.